lol.

i shall learn to blog everyday when im online from now on.

since my blog is rotting anw, so i'll shall pour my heart&soul out.

cny has been alright.

i miss my grandpa]:

i really do.

i cried so badly last night thinking of him.

he died a few years ago.

every cny is so sad.

i miss my uncle too.

though im not so close with him,

i still do.

i cant forget his smile.

so many ppl are dying.

how fcked up is that.

it sucks.

every year just gets worst and worst.

i wonder who's next on the death angel's list.

i miss grandpa]':

mom and i seem normal now.

but she gets fed up with me alot.

went to visit dad's fren&family today.

it was ok[:

when we were otw home,

dad talked about us being stupid

&how stupid it is to argue with us.

blablabla.

&he enphaisesed on my attitude.

how much ive changed to be such a rebel.

&not allowing me to go out AT ALL.

&the sudden change in me putting on EYELINER.

&how much i look like a bloody minah.

&about my friends.

&studies.

&being irresponsible.

&the list just goes on&on.

im sick&tired of them.

this is the damn reason im running away before 23.

prob aft moms birthday.

i still love her.& i do wanna celebrate her birthday with her.

&im still searching for a councellor.

but idk where to even start.

this is ghastly.