to my dear ex best friend, W. i know you still read my blog. coz i saw that questionaire you answered that i did. the one thing that gave it away was the last question. you had the word "Dreaming-" probably because you forgot to read and i know that was in mine. i admit, i do miss you. i miss all the shit we did together, i always repeat so i won't do it again now. i still wanna be friends. just not best friends. i don't wanna go throu the same shit i did last year during my O levels period. i'm happy that you're happy with yat and yes i DO view your tumblr (: i still remember all those criticisms you aimed at me in your previous blog and from time to time i do read it. because i wanna know what really happened to us. truth is, we were both selfish in one way or another. i like it when i first got to know you. you were everything i wanted in a best friend. some of your qualities, i still want in a best friend. but the easiest thing for us is to be just friends. i tried forgetting about you after we met at bugis for the last time but somehow i can't. amongst all my best friends, you were and the best. i miss you, i really do. i try think pessimistically(if there even is such a word) but i cant. i miss you W.
what's up with the Chinese and Malays fighting? first of all, never EVER criticize someone by insulting their race, bad fucking move. if someone insulted my friend's race, i will never forgive them. especially if i know those people are the good ones of their race(some class mates should know) you dont apologize yet you trying to start a conversation. who the fuck are you trying to kid?! no seriously dude. you can open your mouth and insult others but somehow you cant even say the word "Sorry"?! what the f.u.c.k
26.7.10
1. Are you single - i dont know.
2. Are you happy - yes.
3. Are you bored – yes.
4. Are you naked - no.
5. Are you a blonde - no.
6. Are you moody – no.
7. Are you a lover/hater - lover.
8. Are you hot/cold - cold.
9. Are you Irish - no.
10. Are you Asian- yes.
TEN FACTS
1. Name – Dharshy.
2. Nicknames –D.
3. Any birth marks - no.
4. Hair color – red.
5. Natural hair color - brown.
6. Eye color - black.
7. Height - 168.5cm.
8. Mood - monotonous
9. Favorite color – black, brown, gold, orange.
10. One Place to Visit - Greece.
TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE
1. Do you believe in love at first sight – no.
2. Do you believe in soul mates - mmmaybe.
3. Have you ever been hurt emotionally - yes, very much.
4. Have you ever broke someone’s heart? - i don't know.
5. Ever had your heart broken? - yes.
6. Have you ever liked someone but never told them? - yes.
7. Are you afraid of commitment? - i don't know.
8. Who was the last person you hugged? - April.
9. Who was the last person you said I love you to? - its been a year plus.
TEN THIS OR THAT
1. Love or lust – love.
2. Cats or dogs – dogs.
3. A few best friends or many regular friends - a few bestfriends.
4. Television or internet - internet.
5. Chinese Or Indian - Chindian (ME)
6. Wild night out or romantic night in – depending on my mood.
7. Money or Happiness - both.
8. Night or Day - night.
9. MSN or Phone - iPhone.
TEN HAVE YOU EVER
1. Been caught sneaking out – YES(fail).
2. Been skinny dipping - no.
3. Bungee jumped – yes.
4. Lied to someone you liked – yes.
5. Finished an entire jaw breaker – what's that.
6. Wanted an ex bf/gf back – yes.
7. Cried because you lost a pet – no, but about to.
8. Wanted to disappear – yes.
TEN PREFERENCES IN A PARTNER
1. Smile or eyes - eyes.
2. Light or dark hair – either.
3. Hugs or kisses - both.
4. Shorter or taller – talller.
5. Intelligence or attraction – both.
6. Romantic or spontaneous - both/either.
7. Funny or serious - funny.
8. Older or Younger - older.
9. Outgoing or quiet - outgoing.
10. Sweet or Bad Ass – both.
TEN HAVE YOU’S
1. Ever performed in front of a large crowd - yes.
2. Ever done drugs – no.
3. Ever been on a cheerleading team - no.
4. Ever Been on a dance team - yes.
5. Ever been on a sports team - yes.
6. Ever been in a drama play/production - yes.
7. Ever owned a BMW, Mercedes Benz, Escalade, Hummer or Bentley? - no.
8. Ever been in a rap video? - no.
TEN LASTS
1. Last phone call you made - E*
2. Last person you hung out with - best f.
3. Last time you worked - last month.
4. Last person you tackled - Cream.
5. Last person you IM’d - Jeremy.
6. Last person(s) you went to the movies with -E*
7. Last thing you missed – shopping.
8. Last thing you ate - Chicken Katsu rice bowl.
LAST PERSON TO
1. Sleep in bed beside you? - no one.
2. Saw you cry? – the people i use to hang out with.
3. You went out to dinner with? - E*
4. You talked on the phone to? - E*
5. Made you laugh? - E*
WOULD YOU RATHER
1. Pierce your nose or tongue? - BOTH.
2. Be serious or be funny? - both.
3. Drink whole or skim milk? - skim milk.
4. Spend time with your parents or enemies? - parents.
ARE YOU
1. Simple or complicated? - complicated
2. Retarded? - yes.
DO YOU PREFER
1. Flowers or candy? - flowers.
2. Gray or black?- both.
3. Color or Black and white photos? - color.
4. Sunrise or sunset? - sunset.
5. Staying up late or waking up early? - staying up late
ANSWER TRUTHFULLY
1. Do you like anyone? - yes.
2. Do they know it? - yes.
DO YOU PREFER
1. Sun or moon? - moon.
2. Winter or Summer? - winter.
3. Left or right? - left.
4. 10 acquaintances or having two best friends? - two best f.
5. Sun or rain? - rain.
6. Vanilla or chocolate ice cream? - vanilla.
7. Vodka or Jack Daniels? - none.
UNIQUE
1. Nervous Habits? - rubbing my ears.
2. Are you double jointed? - no.
3. Can you twist your tongue around and roll it? -no.
4. Can you raise one eyebrow? - yes.
5. Can you cross your eyes? - yes.
6. Do you make your bed daily? - no.
IN THE LAST MONTH HAVE YOU
1. Had a relationship? - no.
2. Bought something? - yes.
3. Sang? - yes.
4. Been hugged? - yes.
5. Felt stupid? - yes.
6. Missed someone? - yes, very much.
LASTS
1. Last Alcoholic Drink: Red Wine.
2. Last Car ride: on the way to school today.
3. Last Movie Seen: Eclipse(no kidding)
4. Last Song Played: Dreaming- Laura Marling
2. Are you happy - yes.
3. Are you bored – yes.
4. Are you naked - no.
5. Are you a blonde - no.
6. Are you moody – no.
7. Are you a lover/hater - lover.
8. Are you hot/cold - cold.
9. Are you Irish - no.
10. Are you Asian- yes.
TEN FACTS
1. Name – Dharshy.
2. Nicknames –D.
3. Any birth marks - no.
4. Hair color – red.
5. Natural hair color - brown.
6. Eye color - black.
7. Height - 168.5cm.
8. Mood - monotonous
9. Favorite color – black, brown, gold, orange.
10. One Place to Visit - Greece.
TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE
1. Do you believe in love at first sight – no.
2. Do you believe in soul mates - mmmaybe.
3. Have you ever been hurt emotionally - yes, very much.
4. Have you ever broke someone’s heart? - i don't know.
5. Ever had your heart broken? - yes.
6. Have you ever liked someone but never told them? - yes.
7. Are you afraid of commitment? - i don't know.
8. Who was the last person you hugged? - April.
9. Who was the last person you said I love you to? - its been a year plus.
TEN THIS OR THAT
1. Love or lust – love.
2. Cats or dogs – dogs.
3. A few best friends or many regular friends - a few bestfriends.
4. Television or internet - internet.
5. Chinese Or Indian - Chindian (ME)
6. Wild night out or romantic night in – depending on my mood.
7. Money or Happiness - both.
8. Night or Day - night.
9. MSN or Phone - iPhone.
TEN HAVE YOU EVER
1. Been caught sneaking out – YES(fail).
2. Been skinny dipping - no.
3. Bungee jumped – yes.
4. Lied to someone you liked – yes.
5. Finished an entire jaw breaker – what's that.
6. Wanted an ex bf/gf back – yes.
7. Cried because you lost a pet – no, but about to.
8. Wanted to disappear – yes.
TEN PREFERENCES IN A PARTNER
1. Smile or eyes - eyes.
2. Light or dark hair – either.
3. Hugs or kisses - both.
4. Shorter or taller – talller.
5. Intelligence or attraction – both.
6. Romantic or spontaneous - both/either.
7. Funny or serious - funny.
8. Older or Younger - older.
9. Outgoing or quiet - outgoing.
10. Sweet or Bad Ass – both.
TEN HAVE YOU’S
1. Ever performed in front of a large crowd - yes.
2. Ever done drugs – no.
3. Ever been on a cheerleading team - no.
4. Ever Been on a dance team - yes.
5. Ever been on a sports team - yes.
6. Ever been in a drama play/production - yes.
7. Ever owned a BMW, Mercedes Benz, Escalade, Hummer or Bentley? - no.
8. Ever been in a rap video? - no.
TEN LASTS
1. Last phone call you made - E*
2. Last person you hung out with - best f.
3. Last time you worked - last month.
4. Last person you tackled - Cream.
5. Last person you IM’d - Jeremy.
6. Last person(s) you went to the movies with -E*
7. Last thing you missed – shopping.
8. Last thing you ate - Chicken Katsu rice bowl.
LAST PERSON TO
1. Sleep in bed beside you? - no one.
2. Saw you cry? – the people i use to hang out with.
3. You went out to dinner with? - E*
4. You talked on the phone to? - E*
5. Made you laugh? - E*
WOULD YOU RATHER
1. Pierce your nose or tongue? - BOTH.
2. Be serious or be funny? - both.
3. Drink whole or skim milk? - skim milk.
4. Spend time with your parents or enemies? - parents.
ARE YOU
1. Simple or complicated? - complicated
2. Retarded? - yes.
DO YOU PREFER
1. Flowers or candy? - flowers.
2. Gray or black?- both.
3. Color or Black and white photos? - color.
4. Sunrise or sunset? - sunset.
5. Staying up late or waking up early? - staying up late
ANSWER TRUTHFULLY
1. Do you like anyone? - yes.
2. Do they know it? - yes.
DO YOU PREFER
1. Sun or moon? - moon.
2. Winter or Summer? - winter.
3. Left or right? - left.
4. 10 acquaintances or having two best friends? - two best f.
5. Sun or rain? - rain.
6. Vanilla or chocolate ice cream? - vanilla.
7. Vodka or Jack Daniels? - none.
UNIQUE
1. Nervous Habits? - rubbing my ears.
2. Are you double jointed? - no.
3. Can you twist your tongue around and roll it? -no.
4. Can you raise one eyebrow? - yes.
5. Can you cross your eyes? - yes.
6. Do you make your bed daily? - no.
IN THE LAST MONTH HAVE YOU
1. Had a relationship? - no.
2. Bought something? - yes.
3. Sang? - yes.
4. Been hugged? - yes.
5. Felt stupid? - yes.
6. Missed someone? - yes, very much.
LASTS
1. Last Alcoholic Drink: Red Wine.
2. Last Car ride: on the way to school today.
3. Last Movie Seen: Eclipse(no kidding)
4. Last Song Played: Dreaming- Laura Marling
22.7.10
faci is being bitchy today. okay no i am being bitchy. never fancied enterprise one bit. even if it helps me i really DON'T wanna give a shit. really fucking annoyed with people cancelling on me last minute, people cancelling on me after i planned the whole shit out. my ex bestf is right. no one appreciates me coz im some loser bitch. eh F, i know you're reading this, hope you're happy.
21.7.10
right now i jus feel like leaving class and going to spent time with mom. but she dont like spending time with me, sigh. all i want is someone to love me. a mother to love me. i crave for this feeling. whenever i'm having my red flag, i start thinking more than i usually do. i feel more bitchy than i usually do. i feel the need to go out more and stay out late, dress up and take many many pictures. i wanna find a real proper book to read with the company of starbucks. i wanna party all night long and go for house parties, or sit outside 313 and people watch. okay all these are actually things i wanna do with/without red flag. hahahahahahaha. surprisingly, i'm not missing E*. maybe it is because of what happened last night? B told me something very important.
He's not even your boyfriend.
Means i have no right to feel pissed or angry or disappointed, right? Right. I don't wanna think of what's going to happen on Saturday night. i'm just going early, be happy and get out.
20.7.10
independent
once you appeared i lost my independency. i depended so much on you. till one day B told me i'm being paranoid. somehow that hit me. coz i realized it was because i depended on you more than i thought i did, that paranoia came about. i feel so happy meeting you. so happy that i wanna meet you more than twice a week. i never knew a guy could do this to me. i always expected a girl to do that(because of how happy my friend is) but you make me so happy. idk why i just have this happy fuzzy feeling when i think about you. so much so that i'm even alright with deactivating my facebook.
sometimes i feel lonely, but somehow i rather be lonely and with you then with people who i dont know if i can call friends. i feel fake with them sometimes. idk i just wanna be real. yeah this post is rather, no link. haha. i actually thought of a lot of things last night, to blog about. now my mind is just a blank sheet of paper.
19.7.10
16.7.10
SOMERSET
going shopping with best friend later. i need wedges. mmm, i hate political shit but i seem to be heavily influenced. saturday shopping, alone. sunday shopping with A. i am controlling my addictions and my temper. honestly i still feel unappreciated ):
15.7.10
12.7.10
11.7.10
9.7.10
nintendo wii
you make me happy. somehow i get the impression that you're different. i hope this impression lasts. you say you like me and you want to date me even though i'm chubby & lead a mediocre life. you say you want to meet me & hug me even though you stay far from i. i want this to last & i really hope it does. you text me every morning and you spent your prepaid all on me. you buy me cajun chicken when we go to LJS & you know i'm a hardcore chicken fan. cyu tomorrow Nintendo.
6.7.10
5.7.10
saturday, mmm. i cannot wait (:
i shall pass through this whole week with ease, hopefully.
okay who am i kidding, this week is shit (except for tomorrow & saturday)
mmm
i wanna dance, dance till i can't feel my legs, till i start to fly. till i'm in my own world and nothing can penetrate into my little bubble. it's a steel invisible bubble. anyone care to join? (:
4.7.10
2.7.10
what happens when someone you love became someone you loved?
sometimes people attack others because they think they can bring that person down. and this gives them joy. sick, right? yes people like these do exist.
humans generally are all stubborn. but sooner or later, they've got to accept the fact that they are this way. and they have to change. i'm one of them. but i do believe i change over time. to that dear person who uses my posts to attack me. i hope you read this. sooner or later, you've got to stop this no matter how pathetic your life may be.
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