FUCK THE WORD LOVE
sigh.
i teared the moment we sayed goodbye.
its fucking hard holding it all back.
well aft all, i just realised how much you cared for my feelings.
i know he def didn't.
but you're my bestie.
&yes its my fault.
sigh.
i just cant help it right now.
you cannot stop love.
but i really do not understand why you both chose not to tell me.
only aft a few days.
i knw i said i wont blog about this anymore.
but my heart is fucking acheing right now.
why am i still so fucked up about this shit?
&darling you are right.
whatever you told me does make me fucking sad.
but you know me.
anw, thanks for telling me.
when he comes back, i dont dare to see him.
why? idk.
maybe cause it would pain so, so much more.
&seeing you & him together would just make me go fucking suicidal.
i want & i dont want you to tell me when he's back.
sigh.
i need fucking ciggerettes.
i wanna smoke myself to death.
i wanna cough so hard, i cough blood.
i wanna get the worst migrain in fucking history i actually die in mere seconds from it.
I JUST WANNA FUCKING DIE RIGHT NOW!!