i want a close close guy friend, one like dyan. who can bitch about girls or haters or anyone i want. and wont mind my freaky-ness. yes guys reject/avoid/runaway from me cos number 1, I AM FAT. number 2, i am wierd.
its hard to have a girl best/close friend, cos they end up hurting each other, and becoming the biggest emotional drama war. and in the end, you have no one to turn to. cause the two main people you always depend on most, will always be the one who ends up hurting you the most.
and i always complain a lot, i know. that's cause i feel so GAHHHH! prelims is in less than 2 days, o levels is in less than idontknow how many days, and my birthday is in less than 51 days.
51=20??? (some might know what it means)
and i have so so much problems regarding beings around me.
and i know i seem to be the most procrastinating iwontshuddup complaining bitch but i need to say it out or i won't be alive today.
and im tired of saying shit that don't happen.
this 51=20 thing MUST happen!
and i feel its just damn stupid to smoke.
the only reason i smoke is cause im hungry(51=20) and i need something to distract my mind, that cooling feeling helps me relax and take problems & studies away. Yes i do drink WINE, cause i love wine. what's wrong with drinking wine at home? now i find it pointless for me bragging that imma drink after o's. whythefuck do i even say that. alcohol taste wierd for people like me. but wine dont:3
im just feeling seriously AHH yet ahhh (:
i do not believe in love / forevers but i think i like someone.
okay people, see me after my birthday, big transformation okehhhh C:

anyone wanna study with me NOW?
text me/msn me.



PS:// if you're gonna bitch about this, please go to hell, to anyone who hates me and read this blog.